Day 9

Give or take, I spend 5-6 hours daily on social media (don't lie, we're all in the same boat), and I claim not to have time to do other things. Well, in my defense, those moments when I'm online, it's when I'm exceptionally bored or maybe I don't have a class, or I'm waiting in line somewhere or something. Now, one thing about me is that I can't work when I'm not settled. I have to be in a comfortable environment to work, and trust me when I tell you I might be in a comfortable environment but I don't feel like working.

Either ways, I still try to make good use of my time and all. Matter of fact, I'm supposed to have done this challenge on my social media page. Recall the “Day In The Life..." I said I usually post daily. There's supposed to be a season 3 but I just couldn't bring myself to doing it so I just stayed away and kept writing but never posting.

Yeah, there's that too. I think I have more writing that no one has ever read than the ones I've put out for people to read. I guess I'm still suffering from imposter's syndrome. I try my best to write and post, but sometimes, I just feel I'm not good enough. I might be right, I might be wrong. One thing I do know is that I don't want to be on same point i.e. I keep doing the same thing and expecting different results.

Life has given us an opportunity to express ourselves and grow, and that growth, I'm working on. Whether I get to post it or not, trust me, I write as often as the word “often." I just don't think they're “public materials" meaning I'm not sure it's for the public eyes. Therefore, I keep it to myself and keep reading and editing and up until I'm cool with it, I won't post.

When I write, I sit back to read it objectively. I say to myself, “If I'm the reader, how would I feel about this?" You might say I'm the writer and I might not be able to see my writings from the lens of others but still, I read it like I didn't write it and I tell you, I've read some of my write-ups and I'm shocked (in a good way) because I'm like, “I wrote this?" Wow!

And some times, I read some of them and close my eyes in shame when I see a few errors or something I should've written one way but I did the exact opposite. However, what I do know is that I am growing and I am not where I used to be. I mean. I'm going 31 days on this! And I'm kinda convinced there are days I might not have what to write and I'll be sincere with y'all on those days, but the goal is that I must post something daily. Even if it's just a word.

Why do you think I shared this?