Day 4

As much as I love reading, I also enjoy seeing movies. I’m even more enthusiastic when I want to see a movie whose book I’d read earlier, and anyone who watches movies with me know that I don’t watch without a dictionary close by. I mean, if I encounter a new word, I’m pausing the movie and checking out the meaning (I don’t fancy watching movies on the TV because I can’t get the luxury of pausing it when I want).

Since I couldn’t do what I love; writing and reading. I decided to do movies instead. I’d gather movies on my phone and laptop but I might not end up watching them for days and when I do, I go on a marathon and then stop again, and then repeat the same cycle.

What do I do with my time? Even I don’t know but I’m guessing I’m always on social media. Nope I’m not scrolling through TikTok, I’m scrolling through Facebook short reels, and WhatsApp statuses, and for more than half the day, I’m always away from the house and by the time I’m back, I’m usually too exhausted to do anything other than sleep.

Not only writing was affected, even my spiritual life was affected. I couldn’t bring myself to wake up early to do my quiet time and study my Bible (meanwhile, I sleep late). I tried devising a means. I usually take the legxus (I trek) to my PPA (Place of Primary Assignment) and it’s usually a 20 minutes journey to and fro. Therefore, it automatically became my prayer time. I’d do a prayer walk in the morning and in the evening, and immediately I got to my lodge, the first thing I do is study my Bible for about 30 minutes before I journey fully into the day.

I enjoyed having conversations with the Holy Spirit on my way to and back from my PPA and went on for weeks until I stopped again. What I never did was to “not” pray and I had to literally struggle to open my Bible every day. As for the days I missed, I always felt miserable. But still, I never stopped trying. That is something I’ve got to learn in this service year. If I made a decision and a plan to do things a certain way and I happened to stop along the way, I try my best to find a way around it but I never threw that decision out the window especially because it’s important for my well-being and I’m particularly referring to my spiritual life.

The schedule I made for it has been disrupted for the third or fourth time in a roll but do I stop trying? Nope! I do look back at how consistent and fervent I was in these things at the start of this year and sometimes I pity myself but I don’t allow myself sulk for too long before I pick up myself again and forge ahead.

My service year will soon be over and I know it’s not certain things would get easier; I might get busier but what I will always do is find a way around these things. I mean, sometimes, I plug in my earbuds listening to audio Bible while taking the legxus to my PPA. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to keep my spirituals intact. It’s not easy but I’ll keep trying and finding a way around it. I mean, I used to have a particular time of prayer such that I leave everything I’m doing to pray. I don’t enjoy that privilege anymore and since I’ve previously learnt that you can pray on the go, while walking and working, I’m that to very good use now.

It might not get easier. Things might get bustler but we have to find a way around it especially if those things are core to our beings, and what I’ve also learnt along the way is that you only find time for things that are essential, crucial fundamental to you while you find excuses for the mundane ones.